You Have Nothing to Fear
by LaydeeBear
Summary: Just a shortie. One of the CSIs is reviewing things from his hospital bed, he's not ready to leave yet. Hint's at character death can you guess who?


A/N: Hey I was in one of those moods and couldn't think for my other stories so started writing and well… basically you can read and work out for yourself who it is.

DISCLAIMER: Don't know em don't own em not making any profit etc etc

WARNING: Character dying, can't deal then please don't read, I have warned you so I don't want any flames!

Kinda sad but...

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You Have Nothing to Fear  
By Laydeebear

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Terminal... terminal? Isn't that something they have at airports?

That's what you thought to huh? Well I found the other meaning and I found it out the hard way. They say you never appreciate what you've got until it's gone, well until you experience a loss you can never possibly know what that means... Until you have your life snatched away from you, you will never know what it's like to be scared, so scared you feel like you're going out of your mind. The worst thing is, there's nothing you can do about it... nothing... I lay awake, night after night and everyday I get a bit weaker and I can't stop it, I'm powerless. This thing is taking over my body and I can't stop it. I just have to wait... sit and wait whilst it slowly consumes me. I can feel it... that's what they don't realise, I can feel it growing inside me, every move, every new territory it explores.

I'm scared... scared to live, scared to die... scared to leave the guys scared to leave my wife... my child...

How do you explain to a four-year-old that you're going away and you will never be able to see them again? How? I have all these questions and I'm searching in vain for answers... answers I'll never find... answers I'm not even sure exist.

000000000000000000000000000

He lay... staring at the ceiling, unsure as to how long he would be there. A week? A day?

All around him he could feel the calmness and serenity that was a private hospital ward where he'd been for nearly 2 weeks now. The pain was gone, he assumed this meant his drugs were working. He felt the air around him grow thin and a sharp pain shot through his head. Grimacing, he shut his eyes tightly until it subsided before cautiously opening his eyes again, as he did so he saw a tiny shard of light appeared that grew before his very eyes and he immediately began to panic; it wasn't his time. He couldn't go... not yet, there was so much he had to do... so much he had to say to everyone, to her... he needed to see her one last time...

Tears fell freely down his face as he closed his eyes and he tried to convince hiself he was dreaming, he thought about them... all the fun times they'd shared. The day when Greg had dressed up with that ridiculous mask with a glove over his head, the time he'd paraded through the lab showgirl style, the bets with Nicky, Sara's quirky comebacks, Grissom… being Grissom. He remembered all the near misses with Catherine how they'd spent many a shift flirting non stop, it had become a game to them both. He let out a faint laugh and thought about her again, about their wedding day; she had looked like an angel, all the flirting had paid off and she'd made him the happiest man alive.

He'd felt invincible.

He frowned again hearing voices around him and tried in vain to block them out trying his hardest to hold on to the memory of her, he couldn't leave her... How would she cope? His daughter, he'd never see her grow up... who would protect her when she was lonely or scared and wanted her father to hold her? He wondered vaguely if Lyndsey was there or if she… There was more noise, some kind of commotion; probably another emergency disturbing the tranquillity of the ward. Maybe an assault, the guys were probably out investigating it right now. The noise from outside and around him was getting louder; damn couldn't they keep it down he needed to sleep.

He felt a tiny hand softly touch his and opened his eyes. A young girl stood by his bedside, she was very pale, with long white hair that flowed freely down her back, she was dressed all in white: a billowing dress that seemed to spread out endlessly behind her. As she took hold of his hand he heard her voice but her lips didn't move,

_Don't be scared... you have nothing to fear_

He shivered and he felt himself sit up. He was vaguely aware that his surroundings had begun to disperse and he began to feel lighter as though all his pain was being taken away.

As he left the world and all that he loved behind he felt a sense of peace, the peace he'd been searching for... finally - He had no fear, he felt nothing but tranquillity.

END

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Sorry, I was in a sad depressed mood...the cause? Damn PMT! Who said being a girl was easy huh? Please review otherwise I'll get even more depressed and cry...non-stop...for a week... j/k (I hope)  
So… kinda obvious who it was huh?  
Again: Sorry it was kinda depressing!  
Loadsa love  
Jen


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